Writer: David Chase
Director: David Chase

Guest Stars:

Michael Rispoli – Jackie Aprile
John Ventimiglia – Artie Bucco
Jerry Adler – Hesh Rabkin
Al Sapienza – Mikey Palmice
Anthony DeSando – Brendan Filone
Drea de Matteo – Hostess
Frank Santorelli – Georgie
Johann Carlo – Bonnie DiCaprio
Debrah Ellen Waller – Perrilyn
Mike Epps – Jerome
Yancey Arias – Arnaz
Tibor Feldman – US Attorney Braun
Harvey Levin – Talk Show Host
Steven Randazzo – Vincent Rizzo
Kate Anthony – Counter Person
Anthony Caso – Martin Scorcese
Victor Colicchio – Joe
Marcia Haufrecht – Fanny
Desiree Kehoe – Nude Dancer
Michael Parr – Bouncer
Sharif Rashed – Antjuan
Charles Santy – Truck Driver
David Schulman – Mr. Miller
Manny Silverio – 2nd Truck Driver
JD Williams – Special K

The episode opens with the boys sitting in the office at the Bada Bing, counting a big pile of cash and watching TV. A former mobster, Vincent Rizzo, is being interviewed about the downfall of the mob, which he attributes to drug trafficking. He says that the sentences are now so high, everyone rats instead of doing the time and Tony concurs. Meanwhile, Christopher and Brendan Filone have created their own lucrative gig hijacking rigs belonging to Comley Trucking. They score a load of DVD players, which are then doled out to the rest of the crew. The only problem is Comley has been paying protection money to Uncle Junior to prevent this type of incident. Junior is livid and calls a sit-down with Tony and the acting boss, Jackie Aprile, who orders them to pay tribute to Junior as a way of showing respect. Unfortunately, Brendan and Chris are so high on crystal meth that they don’t care about pissing off Tony or Uncle Junior. A big mistake.

As if this isn’t enough, Carmela asks Tony locate Mr. Miller’s stolen Saturn. He’s AJ’s science teacher and Tony agrees, thinking it just might improve AJ’s barely-passing grade. But even with all of this going on, Tony is still in a good mood. That is until Georgie, the Bada Bing bartender, irritates him by not being able to operate the new phone system and then Livia sets fire to her kitchen when she is distracted from cooking her mushrooms. Carmela invites Livia to come live with them, but she refuses. She reluctantly agrees to have someone come in and help with the housework, but takes great delight when the poor woman dashes out of the house screaming.

Paulie and Pussy are busy visiting every upscale coffee joint in North Jersey trying to get a lead on the car thieves. Pussy finally gets the names of the guys, but Paulie is so disturbed by the whole rape-of-the-Italian-culture-thing he starts ripping off express machines. When they get to the Saturn it’s already been chopped, so they make the amateur thieves steal another one. It is subsequently returned to the teacher’s parking space at school. Too bad they didn’t let the new coat of paint dry first.

In therapy, Tony tells Dr. Melfi that he feels ungrateful because he should be taking care of his mother. He also recounts for her a loving and warm childhood memory that is anything but. She tells him that Green Grove seems to be his best option and he simply needs to convince Livia that it is not a nursing home. The retirement community deal is clinched when Livia accidently mows down her friend with her car. She only injures her wrist, but Fanny breaks a hip.

After the Green Grove move-in ordeal, Tony gets a call from Christopher. He tells Tony that Brendan boosted another Comley truck. A load of Italian suits. Oh, and the driver accidently got shot. Brendan promises to go to detox to try and appease Tony but it doesn’t work. Tony, Silvio, Pussy and Paulie pick out some suits for themselves and then Brendan and Christopher are ordered to return the truck to Comley.

Tony also suffers a mild panic attack while packing up Livia’s possessions and later storms out of his session with Dr. Melfi when she suggests he has a lot of repressed hatred for his mother. That rage comes boiling to the surface when he brutally pummels Georgie with the phone at the Bada Bing.

Tony
This shit cannot go on like this

Too bad they don’t have a telethon for fuckfaceitis…

Livia
Go on, go, go into the ham…

Uncle Junior
…fuckin’ funny boy too now, huh

Big Pussy
Lemme tell you what’s gonna happen here

I’m fuckin’ Rockford over here

Paulie
Fuckin’ expresso, capuccino. We invented this shit…

I went over for a blowjob, your mother was…

Silvio
Just when I thought I was out…

Christopher
…I use the technique of positive visualization…